the long-awaited fall

hi friends. as we get going i have to give you fair warning: this will likely be another long one. so, maybe go ahead and warm up some coffee or apple cider, grab a blanket, and a cozy spot to read. 

i'll wait...

ready?

alright. well, here we sit at the end start of another month. september went by far faster than i thought any one month could. i suppose that each month - and moment - of our lives fly by faster and faster as we age, we just don't always see it go. 

i've been sitting out on the porch to do my work for the last week or two. any time i can, really. because the  majority of september gave us lovely fall-ish temperatures. this surprised the heck out of me in the best possible way since most of our septembers {since 2006 anyway} have felt more like a sauna than anything resembling the autumns of my childhood memory. 

but i digress. life has felt altogether different from the summer in both good and hard ways. all three kids have been in school for well over a month now and i've started to get used to having more space in my days. granted, this means i expect far more out of my days by way of productivity, and i can get stuck in a cycle that is, well, less-than-healthy.

by now i have realized that i should not put 18 things on my daily to-do list even if i think it's possible to maybe get them all done. because that doesn't leave any space for the unexpected and as much as i like to be in control - or feel like i am - i'm not actually in control of much at all.

you would think that spending years working in ministry, and coaching sports, and parenting would have hammered that reality into my brain long ago. but what can i say? 

i'm stubborn.

and i have a very short memory.

but fall has certainly given me more time to think despite the busy-ness of family life and kids' activities - ie: lots and lots of soccer - picking up again. i've thought around in circles about what the Lord would have me do, and where he's leading. i've questioned and questioned and questioned some more about whether i should stay put, or pivot, or change course entirely, and i can't say that i've landed anywhere that feels solid. it's more that i can only see a step or two in front of my face and the road hasn't turned yet. {sidebar: did you ever read anne of green gables? and her analogy of the bend in the road? i think about that all.the.time. in these situations.}

this is an opportunity to trust. and i hate those, if i'm honest. because that reminds me of how helpless i really am of my own accord.

without the Lord we have no breath in our lungs. he is the giver and sustainer of life. but somehow i still think i can figure this thing out on my own.

on the ministry front fall is the calmest season we have. the ladies have made their way back to their schools and their lives, and we have jumped back into preparing for the next year. we follow along with our players through their college seasons. we go to their fields when we can. we lift them up in prayer and send texts and insta dms back and forth. we pray for them and bring them to the feet of Jesus. 

we take our adult league team to a couple of tournaments. and we begin the praying and planning process for the summer of 2024. we plan and plan knowing all the while that at least half of the things will not happen as we planned them. and that's where that whole trust thing comes in. we trust that the Lord is really actually in control of it all. and frankly, even if we don't trust it, 

he still is.

as i think back over the season, and even this past spring where all of the planning ramps up, it has me thinking about the pieces i really love about what we do. one of the things i love most about the lady eagles is something that started long before me, and is not particular to the eagles, but it is hard to find in general: 

a lack of compartmentalization. 

walking with Jesus is not something you do off the field, divorced from who you are on it. who you claim to be as a christian is not who you are inside the walls of a church, or who you are in the midst of a philosophical discussion about what is right and wrong, moral or immoral, ethical or unethical. but how you allow the Lord to mold and shape your whole life. every aspect of it. 

your belief about God informs every single decision. 

and it's a work in progress. we are each a work in progress. 

that's why we have each other. 

to sharpen each other.

to shave off the rough edges.

to call each other out.

it's a summer full of stumbling and falling on our faces

next to our sisters.

where 25 sets of hands will reach down to help you back up.

the more lady eagles alums i meet, the more i hear about what this community of sisters means to them. the more i hear about the flipped-upside-down transformation that occurred over the course of a summer or two. how gracious of the Lord to continue to work in and through this ministry, in and through this game, to bring women to himself. that they may know how wide, and deep, and long, and high his love reaches.

courtesy of wpsl

our adult league ladies at the beer city cup in asheville

yes, a trophy is nice. but we cannot take that with us at the end of our days. 

a giant game of pick-up soccer in heaven though? 

i'd be okay with that.

xo