september 2nd

yes, i know it's september 3rd. i know. but i couldn't let september 2nd go by without any comment whatsoever.

yesterday marked 9 years of marriage for peter and me. nine years is a considerable amount of time. and we've spent almost 13 years together. i know that is not long at all when you look at some of the incredible marriages around us. at the same time though i'm so thankful that we have a marriage that's still strong after 9 years.

{september 2, 2006}

i recently read mindy kaling's first book: is everyone hanging out without me? and in one of the essays she basically tells married people to step up because she wants to know it's possible to have a marriage like her parents. she wants to know it's possible for those of our generation to have a good marriage and a good family life. an actual good one, not just a mediocre one. not one that looks miserable from the outside.

and sure we have our points of contention, but nine years in i'm so very thankful for peter and for our relationship. it is work, but not in the "super difficult manual labor" sense of work. it's work in the sense of "having a job you really love, but even that isn't completely and totally perfect because nothing is" sense of work.

so mindy, yes, it is possible.

it is possible to have so much to talk about you forget to talk about half of it on any given day. it is possible to have shared goals and dreams that slowly turn into reality. it is possible to be headed in the same direction even if you have to course-correct a few times. it is possible.

it is possible to be nine years in and still dreaming of growing old together and being those 70 year olds living in a tiny house and traveling all over the world. it is possible to still know that happily ever after is not something you just see at the end of the wedding in a fairy tale, but something that can be achieved if you're both committed to it.

so i guess what i'm trying to say is: don't settle. don't expect perfection, but don't settle.

every once in a while it's a slog because life is hard, and making two people's lives come together as one shared life is hard sometimes. we shouldn't expect it to be easy and just happen automatically. the toilet seat fights will happen. the "would you please just close the shower curtain so it doesn't get mildew on it?" exclamations will happen. miscommunication and annoyances will happen because they will happen with anyone no matter how much you love them. and they still do happen because we are imperfect.

but you knew that already.

anyway, all that to say that i'm so very thankful that i get to wake up next to peter everyday. i'm thankful that it's hard for me to sleep if he's not there with me. i'm thankful that he tells me he loves me everyday. i'm thankful for the example he sets for our kids. i'm thankful that he busts his ..... ahem *butt* to provide for us. i'm thankful for the ways he challenges me {most of the time}. i'm thankful that he appreciates the ways that i challenge him {most of the time}. i'm thankful that i get to spend my life, and build my life with someone whom i love and respect so much.

cheers to the last 9 years!
and here's to the years and decades and scores to come!



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