adoption prayers

well friends, i don't normally blog about things in the midst of them. usually i wait until after the story has happened to tell it. i think it's partially because i'm always hoping for a happy ending, or a good spin, and so i wait until the story draws to a close to tell you about it.

in this case, i'm making an exception.

for those of you who have been reading this blog for a while now you know that peter and i have started to look into adoption. [if you started reading recently you can find some back story here and here.]

truth be told we haven't done much, or looked very far. for a while i just didn't have peace in my heart about moving forward with the process. i don't know why exactly, i just didn't.

anyway, this past saturday when i was running my long run for the week i was thinking about all of the kid stuff, and all of the adoption stuff that i had been [and thus we had been] putting off. and i prayed that God would show me one way or another. should we move forward? should we take the next step and get the ball rolling so-to-speak?

and wouldn't you know it, a couple in our church whom we had emailed a while ago about getting together to talk about adoption approached us sunday at church. we ended up going to lunch with them yesterday to talk about adoption. they are still in the midst of the process and answered a lot of our questions.

at one point, she even said that when they started the process she was still a little unsure, but now she's ready and hoping they get matched with a child soon.

talk about timing...

Source: Uploaded by user via Paul on Pinterest

all that to say that last night peter and i talked further about our lunch conversation. we talked further about adoption in general. and we decided to take the next week and pray faithfully - without ceasing - about what the next step is.

long story short, we first need to decide whether to adopt internationally or domestically. and in the past we were leaning different directions. so this week is about seeking God wholeheartedly on this issue. from where do we adopt?

i'll give you a hint about which direction i'm leaning right now:

Source: pratterbox.blogspot.com via Meredith on Pinterest

so why do i tell you all this?
because i'm asking you to pray.

pray with us. pray for us. pray that God would make the next steps [or pauses] very very clear.

you know, time and again when i've thought about, or talked about adoption it has always come up that God invented it. we are adopted into his family. he makes us sons and daughters. we are each a prince or a princess because we are children of the king of kings.

a couple of years ago i broke down crying in the car a few weeks before christmas because i was listening to third day's christmas album for the first time. the final song on the album was the one in this video. 

and as if that weren't enough, in the same week i heard this song too:

they broke me. and while i had always known that i wanted to adopt a child, that christmas solidified it for me. 

i don't know why we haven't been able to have children thus far. i don't know if we ever will. and there are plenty of emotions that well up inside of me when i think about that, but i have to keep remembering that God is in control. that somewhere out there is a child that is ours - whether s/he has been born yet or not. and my life may look a little different than i thought it would, but at the end of the day i either trust that God knows what's best, or i don't. 

and that is where i'm living right now.

will you pray with us?