i realize that it has been quite a while since i posted. it has just been a crazy week! by some accounts i entered into my late twenties. and by all accounts i finished at my job.

my birthday was at the end of last week, and yesterday was my last day at work. it hasn't completely hit home yet, but i have no doubt that it was the right decision.

tonight, as i sit here in the silence i ponder what will come next. i still don't exactly know. i'm still working through and figuring it out. all i know is that i want it to be something big and grand and fabulous. [i'm not asking for a lot, you know.] i don't know what it is yet, but i know i need to push the envelope and try to find out.

in the interim -- as i'm pushing said envelope and simultaneously wondering what a twenty seven year old should do -- i've thought of various things i can do over the course of the next few weeks.

1. learn french, or at least complete the entirety of the rosetta stone package we bought before our trip to france a couple years ago.


2. read rework, a book that peter recommended i read [and since he's really smart i think i'll listen]


3. organize and reorganize my home office. i brought home a whole bunch of books off of my work bookshelves, and some pictures too so i have to figure out what stays and what goes. because with a cozy little house, and a husband like mine, getting more storage is not much of an option. this is what it looks like now...

4. exercise regularly, summertime in charlotte makes working out a pain in the arse. [example: it was 98 yesterday, and 97 today with 500% humidity. yes, really, 500%] so i'm determined to come up with a regular, do-able, get my butt into better shape, schedule. one that works when you're walking on the sun. i'll be aided in this endeavor by some fabulous apps i downloaded to my new iphone! [did i mention peter got my one for my birthday?? so stoked!]

5. clean my house. really well. i don't think you want to see before pictures for this one...

6. cook and bake and create all kinds of yumminess. kind of like the dinner i had tonight:

yes, it tasted as good as it looks.

there is so much more i could say - so much more i will say at some point, i just haven't wrapped my head around all of these changes yet. so much is coming to an end, and yet that also creates room for new beginnings.

i'm nowhere close to where i thought i'd be at twenty seven. i had a different life planned for myself, though i don't even know exactly what all it entailed. and that's the thing -- it's really easy to make plans for ourselves. i think this all the time, "by some set point in my life i want this and this and this..." i want to do something that i decide for the glory of God. and yet, he wants to do what he has decided, for his own glory.

i ask God for things for myself, and then i ask him to bless it, instead of asking what can i do to bless you, Lord? both are "for his glory" but truly, in actuality, only one is.

don't bring me saul - don't bring me the thing that i want that is actually going to make things so.much.worse. bring me david. bring me your choice, your plan. for YOU.

"if you want to hear God laugh,
tell him your plans."
-van zant brothers


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